On yesterday’s post about making crêpes, I received this comment:
I like your bold words
if one just read those
it is like a poem with in a poem
that captures the essence of it all
This was totally not my intention. I bolded a few words in each sentence simply for the visual appeal; to make the page look a little less like a Big Block of Text. But, the comment intrigued me, so I decided to try it out.
“easy crêpe recipe”
cups and tablespoons
liters and grams
“recette crêpes facile”
split the difference
“how many tablespoons is 250g of flour?”
8 or 9 spoonfuls
50 cl of milk
8 or 9 spoonfuls
magic of cooking
dash of vanilla extract
oil (or butter)
Swirl it around
whatever toppings you choose:
nutella or jam or cheese
I like how this poem turned out! I edited a few of the bolded phrases, reorganized, and eliminated some entirely that seemed to halt the flow. I think my commenter was right that those little phrases still manage to capture the essence of the original post, even the humor manages to come through.
Thanks for the inspiration! I think I owe you all some crêpes :)❂
Slice of Life is a daily writing challenge during the month of March hosted by Two Writing Teachers. Visit their blog for more information about the challenge and for advice and ideas about how to participate.
11 thoughts on “9 mars”
I really like how you experimented some more with the text to achieve a piece you were happy with, and I think that adding and eliminating even at the word level is an important revision technique for all writers. You succeeded in making me hungry!
I really like that! You’ve inspired me. I will be on the lookout for poetry for a future post.
The comment reminded me of blackout poetry that I do with my students. I love the way that someone’s comments inspired your poem.
Now if you take the first letter of each line…ok just kidding.
but I do like how – split, dash and swirl
help it move along to EAT
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I love how you revised to turn your writing into a poem. And that it was inspired by a comment. This is truly an amazing writing community!! Your writing also reminded me of Helen Frost. If you need a new book, check out her books!
Great thing to try! Switching genres with a piece- I should try it.
My favorite line? “split the difference.” Who knew crepes were such a forgiving recipe?
When you are home, I’ll gladly eat your crepes! Love the poetry and the idea that inspired it!
This is a PERFECT example of “less is more”!
Beautiful! And that picture!!!
This is very cool! I love the idea of going back and trying it again in a different way.
It’s so fun to use the same content/idea in more than one writing genre like you did with your post. Thanks for being brave and trying out the idea generated by a reader. That’s also what I love about this “Slicer” community.